Advice for Single Guys from Success Coach - Doc
Love
WOMEN DON'T LIE - MEN DON'T LISTEN
Hi Henri,
When a girl jots down every number short of her
Social Security for you, everything is just about perfect. So I'd say you were
off to a darned good start with Bridget. I only wish you two were a little
older. As it is, Bridget is on the outer age range of the "ditz" category, but
maybe she's a mature 22-year-old. We'll find out.
Now, this babe is
running stuff by her folks for one of two reasons. Because she has to, or
because she doesn't have to. And also because she has high Interest
Level or because she doesn't have high Interest Level. What we're hoping
for is that she comes from an ultra-conservative family, because it means she
hasn't dated most of the football or hockey team. So, if you're patient, this
restriction can be a big positive in disguise.
Bridget returned your
call the very next day? Dude -- how many women actually do that? One in
eight? Awesome! Like my Brother Love down in Watts says, "We got Interest Level
here, baby! Hallelujah!" When she told you her parents didn't know you yet, you
should have asked, like my cousin Sal "The Fish" Love would, "Hey -- can I buy
'em off?"
But when she came up with the counteroffer to hang out at her
house, she was helping you out. What have I told you guys again and again?
When a girl likes you, she helps you out. So she does appear to
have high Interest Level. And it does seem legitimate that her parents are
ultra-conservative. This is great -- maybe you've got what we call a sleeper
here.
It's uncomfortable anytime you meet strangers, but don't let
having to deal with Bridget's folks rattle you. When you memorize my book,
nothing will ever bother you again when it comes to women. You'll be
super-confident because you'll know how to handle any situation you're ever
confronted with. So what you do is shine your shoes and brush your teeth and
flash Bridget's folks a great, big smile. Because like my cousin the Reverend
Love says, "You gotta get the parents out of the way if you're going to get to
Angel!"
Sure you're facing a test, pal, but it's not Bridget's -- it's
her parents'! So you've only got part of it right. And guy, look at it
this way -- they didn't throw you out, so you've passed the test so far. What's
more, they asked you to break bread with them. That's a big deal to an
ultra-conservative family.
But don't forget, hanging around her house
wasn't a date. A date is when you and Bridget are alone and nobody's around
trying to block your relationship. So you've gotten way ahead of yourself, like
most guys do. As my Uncle Jethro Love says, "Until all the eggs are broken, you
can't tell how many chickies you got!"
The second time around you
should have known you were going to have to pass the "Parents Test" again. But
as long as Bridget returns your phone call, that's all that counts.
So
now you're stuck with her friends. Ideally, the rule is that we don't want any
of those around. But we still haven't removed the parents yet as blockers. But
at least when you go out with Bridget's friends you're out of their sight.
You're out in a public place with people who aren't her immediate family. Maybe
after two or three of these "friends" dates, you'll get an "alone" date. Look
at it this way - you're on the right track and you're getting there.
Buddy, when you say you haven't taken Bridget out alone yet, you act
like you've been chasing her for a year and a half. You're just getting warmed
up here, man! You'll interview her down the road. The point is, she's giving
you time. She's asking you out. She's making counter-offers. Hello, Mister
Interest Level!
So you'll take care of getting to know Bridget in depth
when her mom and dad finally say "Okay, you can go out alone with Henri now."
It doesn't matter how long this process takes. And like my cousin Fast
Eddie Love says, "You're going to be seeing girls on the side anyway, right,
amigo?"
Of course you should stick with Bridget. And no, she doesn't
want to be just friends. This girl has Interest Level. But your problem is
this: like most guys out there, you want to rush and pressure. To you
Psych majors, you've got to learn to SLOW IT DOWN.
Remember, guys:
until the blockers are blocked, there's no moving forward.
To hear my CALL-IN RADIO SHOW,
send me your love questions or to find out more about "The System," visit me at
http://www.doclove.com or
call (800) 404-2644. Doc Love is a talk show host and entertainment speaker who
coaches men in his seminars. For the past 30 years he has asked thousands of
women, "Why do you stay with one man versus another?"
Copyright 2006 DocLove
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